never mention that you are tired, because you will never be as tired as me.

Husbands, partners, co-workers, shift-workers, friends, family………okay if I’m being honest it’s really just HUSBANDS AND PARTNERS (but I’d tread carefully no matter who you are) please NEVER EVER mention that you are tired, because you will never be as tired as me. At least in my own incredibly frazzled and delicate mind. For at least the next 12 months. Then maybe (and only maybe, I could be this psycho forever) my empathy might once again kick in.

I’m imploring everyone who is around a new mother (and by new mother, I mean anyone with a child under 1, or more than one child, or actually any aged child who still wakes in the night), to not mention the T word. It doesn’t matter how tired you are, she (okay I) will feel that it couldn’t possibly compare to the shithouse sleep that she (I) had last night.

Why has my 2 year old started calling “mummymummymummymummy” in the middle of the night? Why does he neeeeed his bunny to huggle (don’t throw it out of the bloody bed, and I won’t need to pick it up!)? Why is my 4 month old still waking (yes I do know that’s totally within the realms of normal, but WHY?!)? Why has my child who previously slept 9 hours without waking, suddenly started waking more and more in the night? Why can’t they go to sleep without screaming the house down/ needing another cuddle/ feed/ rub? Why does one wake up the SECOND the other goes to sleep? WWWWHHHHHHHHYYYYYY?

Telling me about your shitty sleep last night makes me want to throw things. The RAGE I feel when you tell me about how tired you are, even though I know that you are allowed (at least in a normal person’s reality) to feel this way, is so incredibly hard to contain, and as I smile a weak, teeth gritted grimace, I am secretly imagining punching you right in the middle of your stupid ‘TIRED’ face.

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