I’ll be dead if I wait until I’m perfect.

It has been a long time between blog posts. I’ve actually started about 6 pieces but thrown them to the rubbish heap or ‘editing file’ (read: have saved and forgotten for long periods of time) and then re-read and thought they were too shit to publish and deleted those too.

A while back I wrote a couple of pieces that resonated with a lot of people and suddenly my expectations on my own creative output rose exponentially. I realised from feedback that people judged my writing (mostly positively) and parenting (oooh this was a mixed bag) from these posts and I totally forgot why I was writing in the first place.

Comments about my lack of gratitude and fuckwittiness really bit at my soul. Even though I told myself that these people are just bitter bastards who read things purely for the pleasure of pulling them apart, never actually putting themselves on the line in any truthful capacity.

My high school education remains uncompleted and my University endowed me with a degree in Acting for god’s sake. I am not here to win any literary prizes. Nor am I here to win ‘Mother of the Year’ (obviously!). So why the hell am I neglecting what I had set out to be a basic and truthful diary of my own experience through motherhood, parenting, relationship navigation, and life?

SO here I am with an almost 2 year old and an almost 4 year old. They are amazing as all children are, but better, because they are mine (pride might be a deadly sin, but show me a mother who doesn’t think their kid is the best fucking kid in the world!).

Rio my divine little man is hilarious and ludicrous, emotional and empathetic with some very *cool* dance moves. Sunday is a bloody maniac with a wicked sense of danger and humour and sass and self, and woe betide anyone who tries to change her mind or put a clip in her hair! A friend described their dress sense wonderfully just days ago, and I think this sums up their personalities to a tee; she said “I love how Rio dresses like David Bowie and Sunday dresses like a vagrant”. Touché Sheree.

Anyway, I’m going to attempt to keep up my writing as a tribute to my babes, and to myself. So here is a picture of how they look now, and basically how they are as people. My beautiful little crazies xx

Gabe, Rio and Sunday-49 (2)

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